Notes on a heatwave

flaming june

How are we coping with the heatwave? In the UK, it seems we tend to fall into two distinct camps when the temperatures rise. There are those who absolutely revel in the heat, feeling a surge of excitement and joy when the sun finally makes an appearance after what often feels like an interminable stretch of grey skies and rain. Then, on the other side, we have the individuals who prefer to retreat indoors, seeking refuge from the sweltering heat and opting for the comfort of air-conditioned spaces. This division becomes particularly evident during a heatwave, where the contrast in attitudes towards the sun can lead to lively discussions among friends and family.

Personally, I find myself firmly in the first category. I simply adore the sun and everything that comes with it. The warmth of the rays on my skin, the vibrant colors of blooming flowers in the garden, and the laughter of children playing outside all contribute to my happiness. I spend pretty much all day in the garden, soaking up the sunshine and enjoying the outdoors. I find myself more excited than the kids when it comes time to get the paddling pool out, relishing the opportunity for fun and play. My childhood memories of summer visits to Greece undoubtedly set my resistance to heat quite high; those sun-soaked days spent on the beach have left a lasting impression. This summer, I’ve already booked another 10 days for myself and my two youngest children to return to Greece, eagerly anticipating the memories we will create together.

Reflecting on the past, I remember that when the kids were very little, we didn't travel abroad for nearly ten years. Our vacations were limited to cottage breaks within the UK, which, while enjoyable, often felt like a continuation of our daily routine. In reality, when you're self-catering with a young family, you find yourself doing housework in a different location rather than truly escaping. Sure, having a washing machine in the cottage was practical, but it meant I felt compelled to do laundry just like I would at home, which took away from the relaxation I was hoping to achieve.

On the other hand, the all-inclusive holiday experience hits differently. Yes, it may mean bringing home three cases of dirty washing, but the trade-off for ten days of not having to cook or clean is absolutely worth it. The freedom to relax by the pool, indulge in delicious meals without the effort of preparation, and enjoy quality family time without the usual chores is a luxury I cherish. It allows me to fully immerse myself in the experience, creating lasting memories with my children without the distractions of everyday responsibilities.

As the schools here break up today, I want to remind parents who might not be going away this summer that it's completely okay to take it easy on yourself. Having survived 13 summers of parenting small children, I can assure you that this phase of life, with all its challenges, will eventually pass. It’s important to do what you need to do to maintain your sanity during these hot months. Consider relaxing the rules a bit; the swimming pool, paddling pool, or even the sea can count as a bath. A little screen time won’t hurt them either, and if you have work commitments, don’t feel guilty about signing them up for every summer club available. Yes, they may whine at first, but chances are they will end up loving the activities once they get there, and they will create some truly wonderful memories in the process.

I recently read an intriguing Substack article about 90's mum parenting. My own mother worked full-time throughout my childhood, and while I was fortunate enough to enjoy two weeks of summer holiday in Europe each year, the rest of the time it was my nana who looked after my little brother and me. This arrangement continued until I was twelve, at which point I was expected to take care of myself—a reflection of different times . My Nana didn’t drive, which meant our days out were limited to places we could reach on the local bus, often to destinations we had visited many times before. We would pack a simple picnic and stay out all day, enjoying the simplicity of summer. Generally, those summers were slow, long, and mostly unstructured. I’m not saying I was always happy; there were certainly moments of boredom. However, we didn’t have smartphones or iPads back then, so boredom was just a part of childhood. In fact, I believe that a little boredom is beneficial for children. It encourages them to engage their imaginations and learn to entertain themselves, which is an essential life skill that serves them well as they grow older.

So whether your summer holidays are well underway, or just beginning, be kind to yourself, let go of expectations and try to enjoy it all.

Have a lovely summer

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